Weekend Blues

Yesterday night I realized that I couldn't remember whether I'd taken my LDN or not. It's a bad idea to take more than my regular dose, so I decided not to risk it. This morning I discovered that I probably had not taken it at all. I've been waking up reasonably rested at 5:30 this past couple weeks, but today I woke up groggy and still exhausted at 9:30, feeling a bit beaten up and not at all ready to face the day.

I took my LDN very consciously tonight. Good plan.

Monday is the day I go in to see Dr. Bouncy. I had blood labs drawn last Monday, so I'll get the results of that, talk to him about the symptoms I've been having lately, and see whether he thinks I need to change back to the original aromatase inhibitor, stick with the one I'm on and see him again in a month, or perhaps even do another scan (not an option I like at all).

The rotten thing about the hip pain is that it could be progression, it could be arthritis, it could be a temporary flareup from the new AI, or it could even be a side-effect indicating that it and/or the LDN is working - you can get pain from the regression of the tumor from the bone, leaving a sort of empty hole. The bit of liver pain could be from progression, or it could be from whatever problem the AI is causing that makes my liver enzymes go up. The tumors in my chest wall... well, I have NO idea what is going on there. It's weird, but that doesn't necessarily translate into something identifiable.

Anyway. Hopefully Dr. Bouncy can help me sort this stuff out, but in the meantime I just feel apprehensive. It doesn't help that my blood tests from my other doctor show that my cholesterol is up (also a side effect of the AI), that my blood sugar is slightly up (not surprising, as I've been eating wheat again lately), and of course I'm gaining weight again (I'd finally stabilized, I think, with the old AI, but started gaining again as soon as I started the new one). All of which makes me suspect that the test results are unlikely to be positive.

Cancer is such a bugger. You can't just sit and watch it eat away at you - you have to deal with all your other systems wigging out, too. What the cancer doesn't get, the treatment for the cancer is happy to muck up.

Anyway. I'll report back on Monday or so. In the meantime, I've got the weekend of fear and loathing to get through.

So I'm doing what any rational, right-thinking person would do.

I'm going shoe shopping.