The meeting with Dr. Bouncy was not particularly encouraging.
In fact, he admitted that we are running out of good options, and actually told me that he would understand if and when I decided I wanted to stop treatment and switch to hospice care. His list of remaining options sounded fairly awful, and from his expression while listing them, I suspect they hold little hope and much worse side effects.
He asked for a hug, and got a little teary-eyed.
Needless to say, this was all very different from his usual optimistic 'never say die' attitude. Not a good sign.
For the moment, he doesn't feel that a scan this soon would be a good idea. He lowered the dosage on the Gemzar and raised the dosage on the steroids, hoping to balance lowering of side effects against lowering of potential effectiveness. We will see how it goes.
In the meantime, he says that he will see if he can get me Capecitabine from the pharmaceutical company on a 'compassionate use' basis, since our insurance will not cover the prescription and the private cost would be nearly half of our already inadequate income. It's the last of the 'less awful, potentially more effective' chemo options, so please cross your fingers or pray or send good thoughts (whichever seems best to you) in my direction, in hopes that he will be successful.