Still Here... Sort Of

I know I haven't written lately.

That is because I haven't had anything to say.  I haven't had anything to say because I haven't been able to do much, other than lay in bed and be miserable.

The Gemzar is not agreeing with me.  This last week I spent nearly entirely in bed with a high fever (up to the mid 103's).  There's no evidence of infection, which is the concern with high fevers and chemo.  And fever is not unusual with Gemzar, in particular.  It's just that usually people get 'flu symptoms' for one or two days.  I get them for five or six, and I get them hard.

The question is - is my suffering now doing me enough good that it will buy me functional time later?  Or am I just suffering and losing time?

And we don't know the answer to that.  I don't know when we will.  But I'll let you know as soon as I know.

Until then, I'm hanging in there as best I can.  But it's really fatiguing to do anything (like get across the room, or eat, or breathe), so I may not report in as often as I'd like in the meantime.

That said, this is my 'week off', so I'm hoping that later in the week I might feel a little more myself.

A girl can hope, right?


Delighted Hands said...

A bit of a reprieve is JUST what you need! Sorry it has been a hard road lately.

soren2go said...

Hope is good. Flu symptoms not so much. During this "week off", I will be sending prayers your way for blessings that will bring you smiles.

Roberta said...

I was afraid of this. Gemzar is a bitch. I don't know what to tell you other than to wait it out. not much choice. I pretty much wanted to die during this time. But I came out on the other end. Hopefully you will too. I pushed the fluids to get it out of my system as fast as I could. Love you bunches.

The Violet Hoarder said...

See, if Roberta can do it YOU can do it too. Push those fluids, and keep hopin'.

krex said...

So sorry to hear that your propensity to suffer the worst possible side effects of a med are still holding true . In the mean time, try and not feel guilty or "useless" by letting your body and mind rest as needed .